Even in ordinary cases, divorce is difficult. In the case of divorce with children, it is a mix of emotions, stress, and the necessity of dealing with many legal matters. That might be too much unless you know what to do and how to cope. The following guide will provide insights and recommend valuable resources to help you and your kids through these changes.
Filing For Divorce with Children
Suppose you consider the possibility of getting a divorce and you have kids. In that case, knowing what you will face is important. An overall process includes:
- Filing divorce petition where you must tell your spouse and the court that you want to legally end your relationship.
- Sometimes, you must be separated from your spouse within a certain time before filing. It is essential to know your state’s rules because they significantly differ.
- Jurisdiction consideration is another important step before the paperwork is ready. Usually, the petition is filed to the county where you or your partner lives. Additionally, make sure you have already met the state’s residency requirements. Sometimes, being married for a certain period is also an essential condition.
- More documents are required when children are in the process: parenting plans, child support, etc.
Temporary Hearings/Emergency Orders
Getting a divorce may not be so quick. However, sometimes urgent matters cannot wait. The following issues might be temporarily resolved during the divorce process:
- You or your children are in danger of getting harmed by your spouse.
- There is a disagreement related to seeing children during the divorce.
- There is a conflict in child support.
- There’s an issue with who stays in the family home.
The courts would resolve these issues temporarily until they are finally resolved once the divorce is issued.
Crafting a Divorce Settlement Agreement
When divorcing with children, there are many points for consideration: child custody, parenting time, financial support for the spouse and the same for the kids, living situations, and shared-decision making. You can create a settlement agreement if you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse agree on these matters. This is a document setting out the terms of your divorce. Some couples find it easier to rely on divorce mediation to reach an agreement; some may litigate, negotiate on themselves, or have their lawyers do so with the other party or their representative.
When Agreement Isn’t Possible
If you do not reach an agreement, the case goes to trial. At that time, both parties will present evidence and give the court the opportunity to rule on these important topics.
The first is that your spouse must be served with the papers once you have filed with the court (serving your spouse means making sure they receive a copy of all divorce paperwork). That could mean hiring a sheriff or process server.
Your husband will then be required to react. They can contest the claims, accept them, or raise a counterclaim.
Next, court dates are set. This paves the way for either an uncontested divorce that could be determined rather quickly or a full trial if the parties are unable to come to mutually acceptable conclusions about custody, support, and property division. Read more about contested divorce vs uncontested.
Even if your divorce is uncontested and you have children, a court appearance may still be required. In more complicated cases involving issues such as custody or child support, a simple judgment on the pleadings is often not possible.
Is Uncontested Divorce with Kids Possible?
An uncontested divorce is often the easiest and most inexpensive way to dissolve a marriage. It saves you the time and expense of a trial, allowing you and your spouse to agree with terms that work for both of you.
It is definitely possible, and even desirable, to pursue an uncontested divorce when you have children. This option requires you and your spouse to agree on the major contested issues in your divorce settlement. Here are some relevant questions:
- Where will the children live, and how will they divide their time?
- Who will make major decisions for the children?
- Where will each parent and the children live?
- How will child support payments work, and how much will it be?
- How will marital property be divided?
- Will alimony be paid?
If this is difficult, consider getting a mediator to help finalize the agreement. After the settlement, your attorney will explain the relevant state laws concerning custody, support, and related issues. These laws will help you suggest how to act in the child’s best interests, for which you are legally responsible.
How Child Custody and Support Issues Are Determined in The Case of Divorce with Children
The guiding principle of custody is the child’s best interest.
You can draft a parenting plan stipulating how to divide physical and legal custody. Physical custody refers to where the children live; legal custody relates to decision-making (schooling, medical care, etc.) If you can’t decide, the court will.
The court’s policy is always to allow children to see both parents. It relies on factors such as the history of primary caregiving, the ability of each parent to create a stable home, etc.
The amount of child support is based on the parents’ incomes and the terms of custody. States commonly use set equations to determine this amount. If you disagree with the state-settled rates of supporting your child, you must explain why.
Final Thoughts on Divorce with Children
Divorce with children is tough, but knowing what is required ahead of time can help make it easier. Each stage, ranging from legal steps to parental time and child support, requires consideration and maybe legal help. Make it a priority to meet your kids’ emotional needs with support and structure, and get help from people trained to work with children if needed. Though this is a difficult time for your family, you can come out of it just fine with the right care and resources to start a new beginning.
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