Crafting parenting time schedules that encourage relationships between children and both parents post-separation/divorce is so important. They should be tailored to the age of the children, ranging from infants to teenagers. By grasping how children adapt as they mature and develop, parents can craft sound parenting time guidelines that provide emotional stability and security.
Age-Appropriate Child Parenting Time Guidelines
Infants (Birth to 2 Years)
All infants need frequent contact with their primary caregiver, usually the breastfeeding mother. The priority at this point is to form an attachment that is safe and secure, and the baby’s routine should be disrupted as little as possible.
Recommended Parenting Time Schedules:
- Short Regular Visits: For babies, it is best to come for various quick visits (3-5 hours) throughout the week. This then means the child spends time with both parents.
- Integrated Overnights: Once the little one feels more at ease, one overnight per week can be introduced. The slow ramp-up allows the child to get used to being apart from their primary caregiver while still feeling safe.
Toddlers (2 to 3 Years)
Young children are at a crucial stage when they are learning to assert independence and socialization skills. Both parents should provide consistent routines to explore their environment.
Recommended Parenting Time Schedules:
- Two 4-6 Hour Blocks: This provides much more time for both parents and ensures some stability for the child.
- Add Overnights: Moving to two overnights per week can reinforce toddlers’ sense of security in their relationships with each parent.
Preschoolers (3 to 5 Years)
Preschoolers are becoming more aware of their surroundings and developing social skills. They thrive in environments where they can express themselves and engage in play.
Recommended Parenting Time Schedules:
- Two 3-6 Hour Periods and One Overnight: This plan balances frequent contact with longer stays, fostering attachment while allowing the child to adapt to different environments.
- Flexibility for Activities: Parents should consider scheduling time around preschool activities, ensuring that both parents are involved in significant events in the child’s life.
Early School Age (6 to 9 Years)
Children in this age group are developing friendships and beginning formal education. They need a stable routine that includes time with both parents.
Recommended Parenting Time Schedules:
- Alternating Weekends Plus Midweek Visits: A schedule that includes alternating weekends and a midweek visit can help maintain stability while allowing for quality time with both parents.
- Extended Overnights: Incorporating longer stays (two consecutive overnights every other weekend) can also provide children with a sense of belonging in both homes.
Late School Age (10 to 12 Years)
As children approach adolescence, they seek independence while still needing parental guidance. They may also become more involved in extracurricular activities.
Recommended Parenting Time Schedules:
- Flexible Weekends with Weekday Check-ins: Allowing children to spend weekends with one parent while having regular check-ins during the week can help them maintain connections while fostering independence.
- Involvement in Activities: Parents should prioritize attending school events, sports games, and other activities together, reinforcing their support for the child’s interests.
Adolescents (13 to 18 Years)
Teenagers require more autonomy as they navigate social dynamics and personal identity. However, they still benefit from parental involvement and guidance.
Recommended Parenting Time Schedules:
- Flexible Schedules Based on Activities: Teens often have busy schedules filled with schoolwork and extracurricular activities. A flexible parenting plan that allows them to choose when they spend time with each parent can empower them while ensuring ongoing contact.
- Longer Stays During Breaks: Longer visits during school breaks or holidays can strengthen relationships without feeling overwhelming, as teens often appreciate extended time away from their daily routines.
Importance of Adaptability
Parenting time guidelines must also retain flexibility as circumstances and development needs evolve. Periodic reviews of the plan are important as the child will grow up and changes in the plan may be needed for the best parent-child relationship. Co-parenting will work well if the couple shares openly any information about the child’s needs, likes, dislikes, and schedules that need to be adjusted.
Parenting Time Guidelines: Final Thoughts
Parents need to understand that age-specific parenting plans are an integral part of helping children maintain healthy attachments to both parents after separation or divorce. Parents who educate themselves on development and adjust parenting time schedules with these factors in mind are able to create an emotionally supportive development environment for their children. Younger children need frequent contact, and older children need longer stays that encourage autonomy.
Learn how to navigate co-parenting challenges after divorce. Also, read our guide to create a successful parenting plan. And don’t forget to follow our Facebook and Twitter pages!
Sources:
- https://www.azcourts.gov/portals/31/parentingTime/PPWguidelines.pdf
- https://www.courts.michigan.gov/49422a/siteassets/court-administration/standardsguidelines/foc/pt_gdlns.pdf
- https://www.flcourts.gov/content/download/215871/file/PARENTINGGUIDEFORFLAG1.pdf
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